almost like normal

rising to an alarm
just like in the old days
waiting for the kettle to boil
morning sky’s a cloudy haze

gazing out at the garden
framed by lace & voile
drops of dew that dance on grass
before sinking into the soil

rubbing tiny crusts of sleep
from near-sighted eyes
loving that first cup of coffee
noisily the bacon fries

so comforting, it is
the return of this routine
it’s almost like the old days
peaceful weekday morning scene

copyright © 2020 KPM

bolt hole

in love with lemon wax
areas that filth can’t reach
glass that’s barely there
the noxious smell of too much bleach

Big Brother’s in da house
thankfully, he’s outa sight
clock is tickin’ far too loud
on this lockdown Friday night

‘n you’re alone
a scared wee mouse
September sun is settin’
outside the walls of your safe house

too much sun, too much Prosecco
giggly-wobbly wine high
good way to start the evenin’
sofa blankets smellin’ of sky

only dinner left to do
vegetables to chop ‘n grate
Leonard Cohen lullabies
embrace you while you wait

as always, you wait alone
a solitary mouse
listenin’ for that magic buzzer
that opens the door to your safe house

copyright © 2020 KPM

safety net

see, the thing about the keys
they symbolize ease

4 tiny tarnished tools
granting entry to the castle
low lights, high plants
escape from noise & hassle

items meant to be used
when heart & mind feel bruised

African statues to fondle
graduation gift from her brother
a now old & faded sweatshirt
mailed with love by her mother

a place with high-ceilinged halls
memory-covered walls

rooms lived in alone
sometimes shared with friends
wide windows to gaze out from
as each day starts & ends

copyright © 2020 KPM

a home in Dundee

everyone needs a sanctuary
mine’s a beige ‘n green dome
a place of love ‘n safety
a carefully created home

thoughtfully chosen
was each room’s colour scheme
to be designed around
an intensely personal theme

happy hours spent in Craft World
to make the wreath for my front door
haunting all the local shops
for the right rug for the lounge floor

with the curtains for each room
I went a little overboard
I wanted what I wanted
so the budget got ignored

lamps, cushions, bookcases
bought ‘n paid for with dispatch
bed linens, bath mats, towels
everything a perfect match

my roots are apparent
about that there’s no mystery
family ‘n friends in frames
honour my unique history

this is my home, my refuge
wherein dwell my fish ‘n me
it’s the place I love the most
my little flat in my bonnie Dundee

copyright © 2020 KPM

a home in Dundee

a poem for Jourdy

“she’s mine” you smiled
with gritted teeth
“I got her” you said
all steel underneath

you saw my heart was breaking
you got that the rain was too loud
you musta known I couldn’t take it
that sympathetic, well-meaning crowd

“I got this”
pulling my arm as you insisted
that everyone leave me alone
to my surprise, no one resisted

so tight you held onto me
with one youthful, tattooed arm
in that moment I was grateful
I knew you’d keep me safe from harm

so long have you loved me
when did that begin?
why do you love me so?
when we’re not blood – we’ve different skin

yet on the day of the funeral,
a horrid, slow-motion blur
you stood at my side
a warrior you were

many have said they love me
but they ignored me when I cried
so many people claimed to love me
but it turned out they lied

many have said they love me
in my 59 years
on the worst day of my life you said it
as you wiped my tears

unconditional is your love
on that day, you showed your care
I’ll always love you, Jourdy
cause on that day, you were there

copyright © 2017 KPM

an assertion of control

water in the fish tank’s dirty
she dutifully changes it
when she’s struggling with uncertainty
her furniture – she rearranges it
when she’s seized by darkness
that seeks to destroy her soul
she thinks of things to do
to regain control

there are always clothes to wash
which she lovingly hangs outdoors
she beats back all dust & dirt
hoovering & mopping the floors
when it feels as if her demons
are on a mighty roll
she resorts to relentless cleaning
as a measure of control

she’s not an indecisive person
though she lives on sanity’s border
(& no, she doesn’t have
a delusional order)
it’s true she thinks too much
but life’s events are oft intense
she does what she feels she has to do
to get her world to make some sense

so when she’s overwhelmed by the chaos
that’s spreading across the globe
she re-pots all her plants
or cleans out her vast wardrobe
when she’s standing on the edge
of that fabled rabbit hole
she thinks of things to do
to re-assert control

copyright © 2017 KPM

certainties

it’s a given
that sometime during sleep
nightmarish visions
into her psyche will creep
mindlessly she’ll weep
            she’ll beg
fighting against
the cramp in her leg
but she knows
he’ll stroke her arm
pat her bended knee
she knows his touch will end
the demons’ psychotic spree

it’s a given
that between 3 and 4
when REM sleep kicks in
he will start to snore
unconsciously he mutters
            groans ‘n stutters
awakening suddenly
destination loo
and he knows
once he’s returned
to the now-straightened bed
she’ll wrap herself around him
and plant a kiss on the back of his head

copyright © 2014 KPM

certainties

in the arms of darkness

there’s a darkness in her mind
a darkness in her soul
then there’s that friendly darkness
that makes her heart feel whole

when he turns off the beside lamp
wrappin’ her in darkness black
climbs in bed beside her
an’ curls against her back

in darkness warm he holds her
her hand rests on his thigh
she dreams in the arms of darkness
his gentle snores her lullaby

copyright © 2014 KPM

in arms of darkness

cuddling Eeyore

still an’ quiet he lies on my breast
animal comfort at its best

ensconced with me in a warm green bubble
an’ a dancing fire that burns away all trouble

gently he snuggles underneath my chin
a faithful companion through thick an’ thin

happily he absorbs my pain
as we cuddle to the music of autumn rain

soft an’ warm he nestles against my breast
eroding the fear that resides in my chest

at peace, I stroke his fur – my heart’s not aching
I’m safe – for now – in a world of my own making

copyright © 2014 KPM

cuddling Eeyore